How PTSD Counseling Can Benefit You And Your Relationship

Medically reviewed by April Justice, LICSW
Updated October 17, 2024by Regain Editorial Team
Please be advised, the below article might mention trauma-related topics that include suicide, substance use, or abuse which could be triggering to the reader.
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Having PTSD can affect both your health and the mental health of the people around you. Often, people with PTSD can be so caught up in their minds that they may not realize how their illness is affecting those around them. PTSD can be a very treatable condition, and if you take action quickly and follow the appropriate treatments, you and your partner may overcome this difficult time together. Cognitive-behavioral therapy, cognitive processing therapy, prolonged exposure, eye movement desensitization and reprocessing, stress inoculation training, present-centered therapy, and couples therapy can be helpful for those living with PTSD and their partners. You can get the help you deserve from a licensed mental health professional in person or online.

What is PTSD?

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Your life can change for the better with PTSD therapy

PTSD, or post-traumatic stress disorder, is generally categorized as an anxiety disorder that usually stems from a traumatic event. Although the most commonly known cause of PTSD is usually military involvement, anyone who has experienced trauma can develop PTSD.

In fact, PTSD affects nearly eight million people every year, and about 8% of all Americans may experience PTSD at some point in their lives. Those with PTSD who seek treatment are usually most likely to overcome the condition and live a normal, fulfilling life. 

How PTSD treatment can impact relationships

According to Make the Connection, an organization that helps people with PTSD, some of the ways that PTSD can impact relationships are:

  • Feelings that you are misunderstood, or your family doesn’t understand
  • Having frequent arguments with those you love
  • Feeling emotionally distant from your partner
  • Feeling as though your children are disconnected from you
  • Avoiding the people you care about
  • Being on edge, jumpy, irritable, and quick to anger
  • Self-medicating with various substances
  • Living with eating and sleeping disorders
  • Experiencing feelings of hopelessness or worthlessness
  • Having poor memory
  • Experiencing difficulty getting through each day

If you are noticing these things about yourself, chances are your relationships may be experiencing challenges from them as well. A healthy relationship is generally based on trust, communication, and emotional closeness. When those things falter due to PTSD symptoms, the relationship can quickly seem to fall apart. Please know that there are very successful treatments for PTSD and for couples who are experiencing these difficulties.

Common PTSD treatments

There may be several available PTSD treatments available to you. The most common and effective PTSD treatment is usually psychotherapy. Many types of psychotherapy can be beneficial to PTSD patients and their spouses. In some cases, medications are also prescribed to manage symptoms while treatment is ongoing. Never start or stop medication unless under the guidance of a licensed medical professional.

Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT)

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Cognitive-behavioral therapy, or CBT, tends to be the most common type of psychotherapy used today. In cognitive-behavioral therapy, the focus is normally to examine thoughts and behaviors, see how they affect your life and worldview, and then actively change those thoughts and behaviors over time. It can be about being more self-aware and taking steps to change your reality.

Cognitive processing therapy (CPT)

Cognitive processing therapy, or CPT, typically uses the principles of cognitive-behavioral therapy to change the way you think about a traumatic event and its impact on your life and the world as you see it. It usually focuses on how you think about yourself, others, and the world after experiencing a devastating trauma. You may examine the trauma that occurred and how it affects your thoughts and views. You may also learn how to examine your thoughts to see if they are supported by facts or trauma products. A wide range of traumas can be effectively treated with CPT.

Prolonged exposure

When you have PTSD, certain triggers may remind you of the trauma. It can be natural to avoid these triggers because you don’t want to feel that way. However, while avoiding triggers can make you feel better in the short term, it is often a barrier to recovering from PTSD. Prolonged exposure therapy generally exposes you to triggers intentionally to desensitize you to them so that you can begin to move past the trauma that caused your condition.

Eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR)

Eye movement desensitization and reprocessing, or EMDR, is psychotherapy that can help patients process their traumatic memories. In this therapy, you may be asked to think about the trauma while listening to a sound or watching a back-and-forth movement. The idea is generally that you are reprogramming your brain and the way you think about and process the traumatic event. While research shows that this can be an effective treatment, some studies suggest that it is thinking about the event that works, and that the back-and-forth movement has little to do with the success of the treatment.

Stress inoculation training (SIT)

This type of cognitive-behavioral therapy often teaches you how to cope with the stress that accompanies PTSD. This therapy is usually all about learning coping skills and ways to decrease the stress that you may experience with memories or thoughts of the traumatic event. This can be a standalone treatment, but it is often used in combination with other types of treatment. Your therapist may focus on this treatment first to help you manage your symptoms, then move on to other therapies that treat PTSD.

Present-centered therapy

Present-centered therapy may be one of the few PTSD psychotherapy treatments not based on cognitive-behavioral therapy or processing the trauma. In present-centered therapy, you will normally focus on present problems and solutions. In this type of therapy, you may learn how the trauma has impacted your life and discover coping techniques for managing the stress and detachment that often comes with PTSD.

PTSD and couples therapy

If you have a life partner or spouse, your PTSD treatment should nearly always include couples therapy. Couples therapy can go hand-in-hand with any PTSD treatment. How your partner reacts to your PTSD symptoms can often make your condition worse and cause more problems. While they may be trying to be supportive, some of their responses to your condition can be harmful. Of course, the opposite can be true as well—if your partner is educated on the best ways to support you, they can help you heal. One way to make sure that you and your partner are on the same page and that they can support you through this difficult time can be to work with a therapist who can point out these issues and help you both correct them.

How partners can affect PTSD

Partners can affect PTSD in several ways. Often, part of the problem with relationships in which one partner has PTSD is that the other partner may not fully understand their partner’s condition. This lack of understanding can lead to potentially harmful behaviors or responses. Emotional numbness experienced by the person with PTSD can lead to resentment and avoidance by their partner, which may only exacerbate the situation. Responses to the irritability and quick anger that sometimes accompanies PTSD can also make things difficult.

Elements of couples therapy for PTSD

The first part of couples therapy for PTSD will normally teach both partners exactly what PTSD is and examine how it may be affecting the relationship. In the second stage of therapy, couples are usually taught to move from a pattern of avoidance to a pattern of approach. Approaching the problem and communicating with one another can be key to salvaging the relationship and overcoming PTSD completely.

Often, partners try to help those with PTSD cope with their condition by giving them what they seem to want, which is usually avoiding social situations and potentially even each other. By giving in to these symptoms, partners may be preventing those with PTSD from recovering. Finally, therapy generally focuses on each partner’s beliefs about PTSD and how the symptoms may be impacting their lives.

Tips for coping with PTSD in relationships

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Your life can change for the better with PTSD therapy

If you are in a relationship, there may be some things you can do on your own that may help you maintain a healthy relationship while you seek treatment for PTSD. Some of the tips that may help you cope with your relationships include:

  • Make a plan to communicate with your spouse when your symptoms are flaring up or when you encounter a trigger for your PTSD symptoms.
  • Truly listen to what your partner and others have to say about your reactions and behavior.
  • Be social, but don’t overwhelm yourself.
  • Find ways to spend time with your partner, friends, and family in a way that will not be too emotionally or physically demanding.
  • Make sure you are not sleeping too much or too little. Getting the right amount of sleep is often important for managing symptoms.
  • Maintain a healthy lifestyle by eating healthily and remaining active.

If you do these things while you are going through individual and couples therapy for PTSD, it will likely help you maintain healthy relationships while overcoming this difficult time.

How PTSD counselors can help

PTSD counselors can help in several ways. First, PTSD counselors familiar with the different types of psychotherapy used to treat PTSD can help you recover partially or fully from the condition. Second, PTSD counselors can work with you and your partner so that you can overcome the relationship difficulties that are springing from PTSD and its symptoms. Finally, PTSD counselors can be available to discuss with you or you and your partner together specific situations and problems that arise in your relationship.

Finding PTSD counseling near me

With all of this information, you may be ready to seek treatment PTSD treatment. If so, your next question is likely, “How do I find PTSD counseling near me?” There may be several ways to find the help you deserve.

You might start with your primary care doctor to get a referral to a therapist. You can also get referrals for PTSD counseling from your health insurance company. If you do not have health insurance or a primary care doctor, you can find PTSD counseling near you through a simple Google search.

In some areas, particularly outside cities, finding PTSD counseling near you may be difficult or impossible. There may only be so many psychotherapists that are trained to treat PTSD in any given area. If you can’t find one or find one that is already overbooked, it can be discouraging. It can also be discouraging to find PTSD counseling, but not be able to afford it.

There may be some other options available. Online therapy can be a great way to make sure that you are getting the help you deserve. It is normally cheaper than traditional therapy at a brick-and-mortar location, but the therapists are usually well-versed in PTSD treatments, just like any other licensed therapist or counselor. It can also be more convenient because you can participate in therapy from anywhere at any time.

This study looked at the efficacy of online therapy for PTSD and found that it could be very beneficial. Online therapy can be a valid and effective alternative to traditional in-person therapy for post-traumatic stress disorder and a variety of other mental health disorders and challenges.

Takeaway

Like all mental illnesses, PTSD tends to not only affect the people who live with it, but also the people in their lives, particularly their partners. Getting effective treatment in the form of prolonged exposure, cognitive-behavioral therapy, stress inoculation training, cognitive processing therapy, eye movement desensitization and reprocessing, present-centered therapy, and couples therapy can be very beneficial for those with PTSD and their significant others. You can find a licensed therapist to provide this type of treatment online or in person.

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