First Date Tips to Help You Land A Second Date
First dates can be exciting and nerve-wracking, and if you’re really interested in this person, you probably want to make sure the date goes as smoothly as possible so that you can see them again. But how can you ensure that the first date goes well enough to land you a second date? What can be done to ensure that everything goes well on that first date? In this article, we’ll offer a few tips to consider for your first date to help you feel comfortable and land a second date.
First date tips
Below are some of the most common suggestions and first date tips for a successful first date.
Make the first date unique and memorable
It’s common to try to keep the first date simple, but that doesn’t mean it has to be boring. There are many different ways you could make the date more memorable, even if you do something fairly standard for a first date. For instance, you could meet for dinner but choose a restaurant with a type of cuisine neither of you has ever had before. Or, you could meet for coffee at a local coffee shop but then surprise your date with a visit to your favorite book store. Or, you could choose a unique activity—like pottery—but keep the activity a surprise. Making the effort to create a more memorable date may make the other person feel special and cared for. Consider looking up some fun date ideas in your area to make a positive first impression.
Make sure your date feels prepared
First dates can be awkward sometimes, and it can be frustrating when little things contribute to the awkwardness, like wearing the wrong thing or getting the address wrong. Even if you want to keep some parts of the date a surprise, it can be helpful to make sure that your date knows enough about what to expect so that they can feel prepared. So, giving them an idea of how casual or dressy to be, if they should bring an extra jacket, and confirming the address of where to meet can all be helpful in mitigating some of the unnecessary stress or awkwardness of a first date.
Be yourself
It’s important to be yourself, especially when dating. If you want the person you’re dating to like you for who you really are, try your best to show them the real you on the first date. By letting your authentic self come through, you can see from the beginning if you two might have a genuine connection that makes sense to pursue further on a second date.
Try to have engaging conversations
A first date is a chance to learn more about the person you’re with, tell more about yourself, discover common interests, and explore whether there might be a connection between you two. Try to make an effort to have engaging conversations with this person through practicing active listening, asking them thoughtful questions, and discussing about yourself. For a first date, it may be wise to try to stick to non-controversial topics to keep the mood light. You might consider discussing your hobbies, past travel experiences and hint at the goals you have in life.
Be present in the moment
Showing your date that you’re fully present with them in the moment can be an important part of creating a positive first date. This means giving them your full attention, rather than frequently looking at your phone or scrolling on social media. It may also help to try to go into the date with a clear head—if you’re feeling stressed about other aspects of life, try to take a moment before the date to destress, release those worries, and be more focused on the date.
Be confident going in
First dates can be nerve-wracking but try to go into it with confidence in yourself. Often, if you don’t believe in yourself, it can show. Try to have confidence in yourself and what you have to offer; this can allow you to feel more comfortable discussing your authentic self with them, and confidence can also be very attractive. If you have trouble feeling confident in yourself and experience low self-esteem, you can take steps to boost your self-esteem, such as through positive self-talk, exercise, and therapy.
Be honest about your feelings and interest
If you get a good feeling from the first date and are interested in seeing them again, you can express that to your date directly, either during the date, soon after, or both. Many people appreciate this level of honesty and transparency. If you’re having a great time and want to have a second date, you might consider mentioning that at the end of the date. This may help the other person have a clearer idea of where you stand, and they may tell their own feelings in return.
Help with dating concerns
If you’d like additional help with implementing these first day tips and navigating the dating scene, talking to a licensed therapist online can help. In fact, research has shown online therapy to be effective at increasing self-esteem, which, as mentioned earlier, can be very important when dating.
As you navigate the dating scene, you may have questions pop up at random moments—like when you have a confusing first date that you’re having trouble processing. With online therapy through Regain, you can use in-app messaging to reach out to your therapist in these exact moments, and they will respond as soon as they can.
Takeaway
If you’re really interested in the person you’re going on a first date with, you probably want to make sure that the date goes as smoothly as possible so that you have a good chance of seeing them again. To help ensure the date goes well, you can consider some of the tips detailed above, such as making the date unique and memorable, being present in the moment, and being confident in yourself. For help with these and other dating concerns, online therapy can help.
Frequently asked questions (FAQs)
Is it okay to kiss on the first date?
Kissing on the first date is really up to the comfort level of you and the person you are with. If the date is going well and both of you are interested in taking this step, there’s nothing wrong with kissing on the first date. However, don’t be discouraged if there is no kiss at the end of the night, as not everybody believes in kissing right away, even after a great first date.
What should you not do on a first date?
When on a first date, things like forgetting your manners, talking over the other person, or getting confrontational are probably not a great idea. It can also be important to respect the other person’s boundaries and not do anything that would make them feel uncomfortable.
How do I make my first date go well?
One way to help a first date go well is to be honest and open with the person you are seeing; be yourself, have confidence in yourself, and be honest about what you’re looking for. Try to be an active listener and communicator, and be fully present in the moment. Asking questions that lead to deeper conversation, rather than yes or no questions, can also help make a great first date.
Should you hug on a first date?
As with kissing, choosing to hug on a first date is entirely up to you and the person you are seeing. That said, a hug can also be completely platonic and may not indicate that a person wishes to pursue things romantically.
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