Is He My Soulmate? How To Know If You’re Meant To Be Together

When you hear the word soulmate, are you filled with longing and hope for a perfect partner, waiting somewhere in the world for you? You may be wondering if you have already met him. While some may roll their eyes at the thought that soulmates are real, scientifically speaking, human are biologically designed to form long-lasting relationships with another person who they see as uniquely special, apart from all others. 

A soulmate might seem like an archaic concept, but many people still believe that there is one true person with whom they are meant to spend the rest of their lives. Here we'll explore the idea of soulmates, the history behind them, and how to know if you are meant to be together forever with your current partner.

What is a soulmate?

The term is thrown around so often that you might only have a foggy idea of what it means. A soulmate can be defined as a special attraction, mutual understanding, or powerful bond that exists between one person and another. A soulmate is a person who is your ideal match who will stay by your side through both the happy and difficult moments that occur in life, offering you deep love, understanding, and acceptance. Soulmates are connected in a way that transcends space and time. Think a best friend and a lover all rolled into one.

A true soulmate is meant to not only be your other half but to challenge you to develop into your ideal self. As essentially two halves that fit together, you act as each other's mirrors, reflecting both your light and dark properties. The purpose of the relationship between you and your soulmate is to shake things up, change your lives for the better, and force you both to transform into the people you are meant to be.

Subconscious signs of attraction may also play a role in the so-called magic of two people who could be described as soulmates. When you feel highly connected to another person, the brain's right hemisphere is processing the communication between you and performing a sort of resonance. You may mirror each other's movements, feel deep empathy, and sense what the other person is thinking from their tone of voice or expression.

Where did the idea of soulmates come from?

Now that you know the definition of a soulmate, you may be wondering where the term originated. The earliest seed for the concept of soulmates came from a story by the playwright Aristophanes. In his tale, he said that humans were originally a “rounded whole” and outfitted with two sets of arms and legs and one head with two faces.

When Zeus felt threatened by the strength of these humans, he punished them by splitting them apart, condemning them to be miserable for the rest of their days until they reunited. This, Aristophanes said, is the "source of our desire to love each other" to "heal the wound of human nature."

Many other philosophers and writers played with the concept of soulmates over the years. The original concept developed into the theory that souls split into two and sought one another over reincarnated lives until they were back together.

Today's theory of soulmates often means two people who are so well-matched they seem meant for one another.

Are soulmates real?

Many people may reject the idea of soulmates because they feel that believing in a soulmate may keep you from finding love with someone who is right in front of you. Others hold steadfastly to the idea, either because they've found the person that they feel is the perfect match for them, or they are set on locating that special someone.

While there is no clear scientific evidence for soulmates, people continue to believe that there is one true perfect match out there waiting for them. Some people may believe that searching for perfection can be a waste of time, while others think that there's no harm in having high standards in love.

Whether or not you truly believe in soulmates, the concept can be a guideline to help you determine the kind of relationship you want. If you want a long-term, committed relationship, it is essential to look for someone on the same level regarding their lifestyle and goals. 

Finding your soulmate

The best way to find the person that's right for you, whether you want to call them your soulmate or not, is to take every opportunity you can to get out there in the world, meet new people, and enjoy new experiences. Keep your mind open instead of having a rigid idea of who your soulmate is going to be.

At the same time, do not allow feelings of desperation or impatience to make you force someone into the role of a soulmate when you know in your heart they are not right for you.

People who believe in soulmates think that you and your soulmate are meant to cross paths at exactly the right time. No matter what, if you're destined to find each other, you will.

How do I know if a man is my soulmate?

If you are asking yourself, "Is he my soulmate?" you probably want to know exactly how to determine the answer. Since soulmates are more of a concept than a rigid set of guidelines, there is no specific answer. However, there are certain characteristics that people who have found their soulmates have reported.

A typical story goes like this: "The first time I met my soulmate, I had the weirdest feeling that I already knew him. "As part of finding your soulmate, you may experience a sense of familiarity like you have already known him for years. You may find it extremely easy to talk with and open to him.

The chemistry between two soulmates can be so electric that even others notice. When you are with your soulmate, it might seem as though you are the only two in a crowded room. It may seem like he is in full color while everything else is in black and white, especially when you first meet them. The intensity can be surprising, and you are unable to stop thinking about them. 

This connection can be reflected in an excessive amount of empathy for one another. When your soulmate is hurting, so are you; in a way, you can feel down in your gut. When they are happy, it's the best feeling in the world.

There may be moments where it feels like you are reading each other's minds, as you express the same thought, even if there's some distance between you. An example is sending a text at the moment that your soulmate is thinking something similar. Don't be surprised if you randomly say the same thing at the same time, either.

Sure, you may have felt all these things with someone, but time will reveal if someone is your soulmate. Once the initial chemistry and excitement of a new relationship wear off, if you still feel a deep connection with your partner, you can rest assured that you are meant to be together.

Do soulmates always end up together?

You may have found someone you thought to be your soulmate, but you were unable to make it work. Soulmates can sometimes come into our lives to help us along on our journey, but are not meant to be with you for your life. You may meet each other at a time when both of you seem to want different things, then separate, only to come back together later. Or you may only be together for a short period, sparking growth and discovery in each other that helps you throughout the rest of your lives.

The idea of each one of us having a perfect match out there, a yin to our yang, can be very beautiful and alluring. Looking for another person to share your life’s aspiration who you feel completely understand you is a valid want for your fulfillment. However, it is not necessarily healthy to look for someone else to "complete" you. This can lead to seeking an excessive amount of validation of self in another person and ignoring the work it may take for your own true self-acceptance.

Having trouble finding the right partner?

Dating can be a difficult road to navigate, and many people find themselves discouraged, especially if they haven't found anyone with whom they can truly connect. Negative experiences do happen, and unfortunately, their impact can add up over time until you reach the point where you do not want to risk getting hurt again or wasting your time kissing frogs. While finding companionship is important for many people, developing a strong sense of self-respect and appreciation is vital in your journey in life. A therapist can help you work through negative thought patterns and behaviors that are interrupting your ability to enjoy life independently. 

Finding a therapist in-person can come with its own challenges, you may live in a rural location, or have transportation issues. You may not have the time to make appointments and travel to and from appointments. Fortunately, online therapy is available to help you and is supported by research to be equally effective as in-person therapy in helping people navigate through life’s difficult moments. 

If you are frustrated with your current relationship, unable to find someone to bond with, or are suffering from self-esteem problems after a breakup, Regain.us is here for you. Our compassionate counselors are available whenever you need assistance with your relationship issues. Regain.us offers affordable individual and couples counseling to direct you toward brighter days.

Takeaway

Couples with a soul mate connection often report feelings of deep connectedness or empathy for one another. They feel a soul connection that lasts long after the initial infatuation stage of romance has passed. The realization that you may have met your soulmate may hit you immediately, a few weeks after dating, or months into a relationship. With soulmates, timing is not as important as the bond that forms between you two.