My Anxiety Is Ruining My Relationship! What Should I Do?

Updated October 15, 2024by Regain Editorial Team

If you have an anxiety disorder, you probably already know how difficult it is to cope with your feelings. When your anxiety starts to take over, it can become so easy to get lost in your thoughts, fears, and worries. This can make it difficult to maintain a healthy relationship, and you may even feel like your anxiety is starting to ruin your relationship. No one wants to lose the one they love because of their mental health. If you’re worried about your anxiety sabotaging your relationship, keep reading to gain insight and advice about what you can do to improve your situation. 

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Anxiety can take a toll on you and your relationship

My anxiety is ruining my relationship!

Anxiety has the potential to ruin a relationship if it isn’t managed appropriately. Left unaddressed, anxiety can wind up manifesting itself in ways that are harmful to you and your partner. There’s no reason to feel ashamed of your anxiety; it’s a serious condition that many people struggle with. With treatment, the right tools, and proper support, you can learn how to manage and move past your symptoms. 

Try to be mindful of your partner's feelings

Even if you live with anxiety, you can still be a loving and supportive partner. Respect can be a central aspect of any relationship, and this is true even when you struggle with anxiety. Even when you’re feeling anxious, it can be important not to take out how you’re feeling on your partner. Learning how to cope with your symptoms can help with this. A therapist can equip you with healthy coping mechanisms that may allow you to think and behave more clearly and appropriately. 

Practice open communication

For your relationship to work, it can be crucial to be open and honest with your partner about how you’re feeling and what you’re thinking. It may be scary to be vulnerable with them but being transparent can help your relationship grow. Your partner cannot read your mind; telling them about what’s on your mind can help them support you and reassure you when needed. 

Apologize when necessary

No one is perfect, and we all mistakes. You might not always think rationally when you have anxiety, so if you hurt your significant other unintentionally, it can be important to apologize to them. Even if you have anxiety, you are still responsible for your actions. Committing to doing better in the future can strengthen your relationship and help your partner see that you are working to grow both as an individual and within the relationship. 

Seek treatment

Seeking treatment for your anxiety can be one of the most vital things you can do for yourself and your relationship. Anxiety disorders may worsen if left untreated, and while you may be able to manage some aspects of it on your own, it can ultimately be important to reach out to a professional for support when your day-to-day functioning is affected. When you speak to a doctor or therapist, they can help you come up with a treatment plan to control and move past your symptoms. With time, you may be able to live your daily life without experiencing anxiety to the extent you were before. 

Anxiety is a serious problem, but it isn't something that has to keep you from achieving your goals in life. It may be beneficial to seek treatments such as therapy during your healing journey. This can allow you to get to the root of your anxiety, and help you develop useful coping mechanisms to use in your everyday life. Managing your anxiety effectively can allow your interactions with your partner to go more smoothly instead of being impacted by anxious thoughts and feelings. If your anxiety has been ruining your relationship, the most powerful step you may be able to take is learning how to reduce the amount of anxiety in your life. 

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How anxiety can ruin a relationship

It can be important to see how anxiety can affect the day-to-day aspects of a relationship. Consider the following impacts anxiety can have:

Anxiety can cause trust issues

One of the most noticeable problems that you might encounter is that anxiety can cause you to be distrustful of your significant other. Anxiety isn't always rational, but those anxious feelings can be overpowering. Your anxiety disorder may make you feel like you can't trust your partner, even with the little things in life. People with severe anxiety problems may feel as if their partner is cheating on them or doing something else behind their back even when there is no evidence to suggest that this is the case.

Keep in mind that not all people who have anxiety disorders have these feelings. Still, this is a potential problem that can harm your relationship when you have anxiety. Do you have a hard time trusting others due to your feelings of anxiety? If so, then you might have difficulties truly connecting with your partner. Healthy relationships require a certain level of trust to thrive, and if that is missing, it can be difficult to be open and honest with one another. 

While it’s true that trust is often built over time, anxiety can hold you back from complete security within your relationship. Overcoming your anxiety could help you have more confidence in your partner and in yourself. This can have a positive impact on the relationship and allow it to thrive. 

Your anxiety might make you irritable

Anxiety can be difficult to cope with. Many people who experience severe anxiety wind up having problems interacting with others. Some people have social anxiety that keeps them from being able to socialize with other people. Others may feel irritable or angry because their mind is so overwhelmed with worries. 

An anxiety disorder has the potential to put you in a bad mood. When you aren’t sure how to control your anxious thoughts and fears, it can be normal to feel stressed out. In some cases, you may respond to your anxiety by treating your partner poorly. Although your intentions might not to be to hurt them, it may still end up happening. Continuing to harm your partner can be detrimental to your relationship over time. Managing your anxiety symptoms can dull the impact that it has on your life.

Your partner might even understand that sometimes it is your anxiety talking, and it isn't something that you truly mean or feel. Even so, there can be a limit to everyone's patience. If your relationship is on the rocks, and you feel like your anxiety is playing a role, seeking professional help to work on your issues can be beneficial. It can take time to see results, but even making progress is a start in the right direction. 

Anxiety can keep you from opening up to your partner

Another common issue that people with anxiety may experience is having a tough time opening up to others. If you feel like you get overly anxious whenever you become vulnerable, it may feel difficult to let someone inside. Relationships require a certain amount of vulnerability. If you can't let your partner inside or be transparent with them, how can you expect the relationship to continue developing?

If you can't be vulnerable emotionally with your partner, it might feel like limits have been placed on your relationship. This can keep your relationship from ever getting to the next level. When you want to build a future together, it can be important to try to change. This might not be simple when you have severe anxiety issues, but you can learn to manage your symptoms for a healthier outcome. 

Once you’re able to be more open and honest with your significant other, your relationship can start to evolve. You can learn new things about one another and grow as a couple. Anxiety can hold you back from this next step in your relationship, but it doesn't have to. Finding support can be key to overcoming the hurdles you’re facing. 

Having an anxiety disorder does not disqualify you from being in a loving relationship. In fact, people who have anxiety can be amazing lovers and attentive partners. However, it may take more effort for you to establish a healthy relationship with your partner. Finding a partner who can be there for you and practice compassion can be vital as you work your way toward healing. 

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Anxiety can take a toll on you and your relationship

Online counseling with Regain

Therapy can be an important part of treating anxiety symptoms, but you don’t necessarily have to visit a traditional office to get care. Instead, you can get connected with a therapist through Regain, an online counseling platform. Online therapists can help you with your anxiety concerns from the comfort of your home. If anxiety has made its way into your relationship, you could also consider participating in online couples counseling with your partner to address these issues directly. This can improve your relationship substantially, and you can even learn to communicate with your partner more effectively. Don't hesitate to reach out to an online counselor to help with your anxiety problems and your relationship whenever you feel ready. 

The efficacy of online counseling 

Anxiety disorders can be successfully managed through online therapy, according to research. In this study, researchers found that online cognitive behavioral therapy was just as effective as face-to-face CBT interventions for treating anxiety disorders. CBT is a type of therapy that helps people learn how to recognize their unhelpful thought patterns and reframe them into more helpful ways of thinking. 

Takeaway

Growing closer, more intimate, and more vulnerable with another person can be scary, which is why romantic relationships often stir up a lot of different emotions. If you’re struggling with an intense feeling like anxiety, it can be debilitating, particularly when left untreated. If you want to stop anxiety from ruining an otherwise healthy relationship, it can be important to seek support and treatment from a professional. Online therapy can help you address your concerns individually or alongside your partner. A Regain therapist can provide you and your partner support during this time and encourage you to continue to grow together. Healing from anxiety is possible when you have the right tools and support. 

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