What Can I Do When I’m Nervous? 20 Calming Tips

Stress, nervousness, and even anxiety can be a common part of life for many people. So, if you find yourself saying, "I'm feeling nervous," you almost certainly aren't alone. In fact, 18% of adults in the US experience an anxiety disorder in any given year. And, even if your nervousness doesn't rise to the level of a diagnosable anxiety disorder, it can still be upsetting and frustrating. What can you do to relieve it? Here are 20 tips to help you calm down.

1. Stop and breathe

Deep and controlled breathing has been used to calm people since ancient times. In recent times, scientists have found even more evidence that breathing reduces stress. In one study, scientists wanted to know if relaxation breathing could help people with cancer. They concluded that these patients indeed benefitted from breathing exercises based on signs of both reduced anxiety and depression.

You can find breathing exercises online or even join a yoga or meditation class to learn how to breathe for calmness. However, you don't have to get fancy. Even if you close your eyes and breathe deeply in and out for a few moments, you may find yourself relaxing quickly.

2. Tense and release

Think about what you mean when you say, "I'm nervous." Is it a change in the way you're thinking? Or is it how you're feeling emotionally or physically? If you notice that your muscles are tensing, a simple tense-and-relax exercise can help you calm down. Just tense your muscles as hard as you can. Hold the tightness for several seconds. Then, release the tension until your muscles feel loose.

3. Have some tea

Tea can be very calming, especially if you choose the right tea. Not only do the ingredients in the tea have the potential to relax you, but the ritual of preparing and drinking tea can be great for cutting back of stress, too. What teas work best? Try these popular options:

• Chamomile tea
• Lavender tea
• Green tea
• Rose tea
• Peppermint tea
• Lemon balm tea
• Passionflower tea
• Valerian root tea

4. Take a mindfulness moment

Taking a moment to be mindful of yourself and your environment can change your whole point of view. Sit quietly and close your eyes. Notice the feelings you're experiencing in your body. Pay attention to the information that you're receiving from your senses. Notice your thoughts. Be an observer only for just a few minutes. You’ll likely find that your mind and body feel a lot clearer and calmer.

5. Go for a nature walk

Getting out into nature can help you calm down quickly. Go to a park, take a walk, or even just step outside. Breathe in the fresh air. Enjoy the sunshine. Walk around to stretch your legs and get some exercise for even stronger results.

6. Imagine a calmer you

Sometimes it helps to picture yourself being calmer. This can be especially helpful if you find yourself trapped in a cycle of being stressed about getting nervous, thereby worsening your symptoms. Imagine your muscles being relaxed, your mind being clear and peaceful, and your lips raising in a tranquil smile.

7. Listen to music

According to one study, music can greatly affect the cognitive element of the stress response. But what music should you listen to? That might be different for different people and different types of stress. The best thing to do may be to try various types of music until you find the one that works best for you. Classical, lo-fi, white noise, and other types of music or sound can be a good place to start.

8. Get a new perspective

If you spend a long time in one place, it can be helpful to get a fresh visual perspective. Perhaps you spend hours at your desk. In that case, get up and look out the window from time to time. Change what you're looking at, and you might find that you can snap your brain out of cyclical thought patterns and relax more easily.

9. Write about your feelings

Try writing in a journal. It doesn't matter whether you use a physical journal or a digital document. Just write about the way you feel when you're nervous. Acknowledge feelings of fear, worry, or anger. Write down the thoughts behind your nervousness to help yourself get to the root of and overcome it.

10. Eat, drink, and be calmer

Eating the right amounts of healthy foods and drinking plenty of water can help prevent bouts of nervousness. So, eat reasonable portions of fruits, vegetables, starches, proteins, and fats. Avoid junk food. Drink plenty of clear liquids to stay hydrated.

11. Have a massage

Getting a massage can reduce nervousness dramatically. But maybe you can't afford a professional massage. Or perhaps there's no massage therapist available in your local area. If you don't have the time or resources to get a full massage, it's no problem. You can give yourself a quick hand massage wherever you are. One study examined whether hand massage would help people calm down during cataract surgery. The researchers concluded that it did have a significantly beneficial effect, which suggests a similar tactic may help you with whatever stress you're facing.

12. Shut your eyes

Visual overstimulation can increase your nervousness. The quickest way to disconnect from all the visual clutter may be to close your eyes. Make sure it's safe to do so, then close your eyes and let your mind relax.

13. Try aromatherapy

Aromatherapy can be a great stress reducer for many people. You can use a home diffuser or simply put a few drops of essential oil on a handkerchief and wave it under your nose. Aromatherapy may work by changing your hormone production or affecting your brain chemistry. 

Some of the most popular essential oils to reduce stress include:

• Lavender
• Lemon
• Bergamot
• Clary Sage
• Ylang-ylang
• Jasmine

14. Unplug

If you can, get away from all electronic devices for a few hours, an entire day, or even a weekend. Whatever you do, put away your electronics at least an hour before bedtime. Research shows that using electronics right before bed can hurt your sleep, which in turn may increase stress and anxiety.

15. Get enough sleep

Have you ever noticed that you feel more nervous when you haven't gotten enough sleep? That may be because sleep can refresh your mind and improve your physical and mental wellbeing. In addition to avoiding electronics before bedtime, there can be other ways to improve your sleep. Here are a few of them:

• Try to sleep at the same time every night.
• Avoid lying in bed for more than 15 minutes. If you can't sleep, get up, do something quiet for a few minutes, and then try again.
• Only use your bed for sleep, not stimulating activities.
• Don't take long naps during the day.
• Get enough natural light during the day.
• Exercise during the daytime.
• Avoid substances like drugs or even caffeine or alcohol that may interfere with your sleep.

16. Shower away the stress

You might be amazed at how much an extra shower can help you calm down. Try starting with a warm shower and gradually change the temperature until it's cooler. As you're showering, focus on the physical feelings you're experiencing rather than the worrying thoughts in your minds.

17. Call a friend

Talk to a friend when you're feeling nervous. You can chat about the way you feel and the worries that are bothering you, or you can talk about everyday subjects and the day's activities. A friend may be able to help you see things more clearly or offer advice. But even if you only talk about random, relatively unimportant things, the interaction and caring from a friend can help you feel that all is right with the world.

18. Meditate

Meditation has long been known as a beneficial stress reducer. If you haven't ever meditated before, it might seem like a very hard thing. If so, start with short meditations. Close your eyes or focus on an object in the room. Relax your body and breathe deeply. You don't have to force thoughts out of your mind, either. Let thoughts drift in and out of your mind, noticing them without judging them or trying to hold onto them. If you find yourself getting stuck on a thought, take a deep breath, and release it.

19. Question your thoughts

Unless your nervousness results from substance use or some other physical cause, there are probably thoughts behind that anxiety. Try to discover what those thoughts are. Then, examine the thoughts. Ask yourself if they're valid. Are you nervous that something bad will happen? If so, ask yourself if that thought is true.

20. Talk to a counselor

If your nervousness continues over time or gets worse, you may benefit from talking to a counselor. A counselor can help you evaluate the thoughts behind your nervous feelings. They can also teach you how to do relaxation exercises that you can rely on when you're on your own. 

An online counselor can help you manage your nervousness right from the comfort of your own home. By speaking to a professional through the web, you can avoid costly commutes to and from in-person offices. You might also find it easier to get started and attend sessions regularly without these additional obstacles to consider.

Online therapy’s efficacy is supported by research when it comes to treating things like anxiety, nervousness, and other mental health concerns. One study, for instance, found that online cognitive behavioral therapy could effectively treat and reduce symptoms of anxiety.

Takeaway

When you can't stop saying, "I'm feeling nervous," don't forget that help is available. You can learn new ways of calming down, practice relaxation techniques, and get to the root of why you're feeling so nervous. When you find the best ways to help yourself relax, you might be able to more effectively tackle the root cause of your feelings and begin to move on from them.