Why Do I Feel Such Hatred Of People, And What Can I Do About It?

Updated October 22, 2024by Regain Editorial Team
Please be advised, the below article might mention trauma-related topics that include suicide, substance use, or abuse which could be triggering to the reader.
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Do you often feel like you’re angry at other people? Do you have days where you just feel annoyed by everything? Everybody experiences these feelings from time to time; it’s normal to have bad days where you feel irritable, even if you’re angry about little things that wouldn’t normally bother you. But for most people, those feelings come and go, and you can typically pin-point a root cause: lack of sleep, hormonal fluctuations, or feeling stressed about something in your life. But if you feel angry at everyone around you almost all the time, it may be a sign of a deeper, underlying problem.

In this article, we’ll explore what is hate, the dangers of feeling excessive anger or hatred towards others and learn what you can do about it.

Need help handling your hatred in a healthy way?

 The dangers of hating people

Carrying around hatred of other individuals will always hurt you more than it hurts them. Whether you’re angry at one specific person or you feel like you generally hate everyone, these feelings will always hurt you the most. Today, the advances of medical science and psychology have shown us that our emotions have a profound impact on our mental and physical health. Many studies have been conducted on the impact of negative emotions on our health, and every single one has concluded that

if you’re filled with toxic and destructive emotions, that negativity is quite literally harming you.

For example, studies show that negative emotions can weaken your immune system, damage your heart health, elevate your blood sugar, and increase your susceptibility to anxiety and depression. Likewise, people who are experiencing an onslaught of negative emotions often seek unhealthy coping mechanisms to relieve their stress. This can lead to an over-reliance on drugs or alcohol and abusing these substances can cause a whole new set of problems for your mental and physical health.

 Reasons why you feel such hatred of people

Understanding the reasons which cause you to feel hatred toward others requires a brief assessment of the psychology of hatred. Everybody gets frustrated sometimes but if you feel a deep hatred towards others on a very regular basis, it’s probably because of something that is very personal for you. For example, maybe you’re frustrated with your job.

If the people you work with regularly make stupid mistakes, break company rules, or make your job harder, it’s certainly easy to feel frustrated when you’re at work. You might feel like everyone you work with is stupid and you may feel angry that your co-workers don’t do a better job. Or maybe you simply hate your job. If the work you do every day is boring, frustrating, or inane, you might feel really angry. You might have trouble finding meaning or fulfilment in your work and it’s easy to feel frustrated and under-stimulated as a result.

Regardless of the reasons behind hatred, overcoming this feeling is necessary to live a healthy life.

Fear

It is a well-established fact that people tend to hate what they fear. In many cases, fear is experienced when someone feels threatened, and especially when they feel powerless to stop what they believe will trigger their downfall. If you find yourself ongoingly experiencing hatred of people, ask yourself what type of people make you feel this way. Is your hatred for individuals in positions of power and the ability to make decisions about your life? Is your hatred for people who are hurting you emotionally, physically, psychologically, etc.?

Fear is not always as obvious as most people would like to believe. In many cases, anger and hatred are employed as defense mechanisms against feelings of fear. Very often, fear makes people feel weak, and that's the last thing anyone wants to experience.

Getty/AnnaStills

Self-loathing

Believe it or not, how you feel about yourself can impact the lens through which you view others. People often struggle to truly see their only flaws. Even if you know that there are things you dislike about yourself, your awareness of this fact may exist primarily in your subconscious. So, because you haven’t fully acknowledged these feelings, they may show up in the form of irrational and unexplained bursts of anger toward others.

For example, maybe you often struggle with impatience. As a result, you might interrupt others when they’re speaking or do a sloppy, hurried job with your work. So, if you encounter someone else who does the same things, you might feel deeply frustrated whenever you interact with them— so much so that you might feel as if you hate them!

In cases like this, the problem is easily solved. You don’t hate that other person— you hate the negative traits you recognise in yourself. Working with a therapist can help you to identify these traits and develop positive coping mechanisms that will help you improve yourself and your relationships with others.

 Social conditioning

The environments which someone is exposed to and regularly a part of will inevitably impact them in one way or another. Sometimes these impacts are positive; other times, they're not. Regardless, social conditioning is very real; it happens through media, interactions with others, and the undertones of messages fed to the masses. Even if it's untrue, the internalization of certain information can often lead to someone feeling the hatred of other people. More often than not (omit both highlighted sections), this hatred is not justified but is often manipulated to serve the agendas of powerful individuals.

 How to rise above hatred

Rising above hatred is not always the easiest or most comfortable thing to do. If you’re angry at something or someone, it can be difficult to let go of that anger— especially if you know your anger is justified. Fortunately, however, with determination and commitment, you can develop healthy coping mechanisms that will help you relinquish the negativity you’re carrying inside.

 Focus on bettering yourself

One of the best ways to free yourself from hatred of others is to focus on bettering yourself. Whether you realize it or not, hating other people takes a lot of energy; imagine how much you could benefit from directing that energy towards self- improvement! As you take steps to improve who you are, you may find that certain lifestyle changes are in order. Life is a journey, and we should all be learning and evolving as we go along.

 Surround yourself with better people

In certain cases, hatred of other people may indicate a need to surround yourself with a better crowd. For example, if you feel hatred towards your co-workers and you spend most of your time at work, you may need a break so you can surround yourself with people who cheer you up. A little time spent with friends who can make you laugh and feel better about life can be rejuvenating!

It may also mitigate your feelings of hatred. If you feel overwhelmed or surrounded by people who frustrate you, it can do a lot of good to remember that your co-workers aren’t the only people in the world; there are plenty of awesome people out there who can restore your spirit!

By contrast, however, sometimes your friends can be the problem. If you regularly hang out with people who are also angry, who blame others for their problems, or believe that certain types of people are responsible for all their stress, your friends may be dragging you down. Often, this happens before we fully realise it, but our friends’ views, attitudes, and behaviours rub off on us. So, if you do a careful self- evaluation and find that your friends have a negative impact on you, it may be time to change the type of company you keep.

Bring joy into your life

Having joy in your life is another constructive way of rising above hatred. Surrounding yourself with positive people is great but it’s also important to think about who you are as a person and how you can create a joyful life. For example, think about your hobbies. What do you enjoy doing? What makes you smile?

In today’s chaotic world, it’s easy to feel stressed and overwhelmed. And that’s exactly why we have to be intentional in our pursuit of joy. So, if you feel like your life has an uneven stress-to-joy ratio, make a conscious effort to think about what you can do to cultivate a joyful life.

 When seeking professional therapy is advisable

Getty/AnnaStills
Need help handling your hatred in a healthy way?

Unfortunately, certain times in life where hatred for other people is representative of more deep-seated issues. Sometimes, underlying or repressed trauma is the culprit, which happens more often than most people would like to believe. When serious issues are not properly addressed and dealt with, they don't simply go away; they linger and later materialize in various fashions, which are often harmful and destructive to you as an individual or to those around you.

If you constantly asked yourself "Why do I hate everyone?" and you find yourself in a situation where you are continuously experiencing hatred for other people, seeking professional therapy might be a very good idea for you.

There are many common misconceptions about therapy, but don’t be fooled! There is nothing wrong or shameful about seeking assistance from a professional therapist. The mind is a part of the body just like your eyes or arms; therapy is just as normal and natural as seeking help for a broken arm! So, if you feel like you’re struggling with any aspect of mental health, it’s always okay to ask for help!

If you do decide to connect with a therapist, you may find that online therapy works best for you. Online therapy comes with certain perks which are absent from more traditional forms of mental health care; unlike traditional therapy sessions which involve sitting down in an office with a specialist, online therapy empowers you to receive guidance on the go.

Takeaway

Life can be challenging at times, and roadblocks tend to materialize in unexpected ways and inopportune times. Online therapy creates a path to recovery, growth, solutions, and the ability to grow stronger in the face of adversity.

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