How To Be Supportive In Your Relationship

It can be an adjustment for many individuals to go from being on their own to being in a relationship, and figuring out how to be a supportive partner can sometimes take some getting used to. Being supportive of your partner while dealing with things in your own life can sometimes be challenging, but learning how to navigate this balance can be important for the health and strength of your relationship. So, how do you go about becoming that supportive person in your relationship? Read on for a few ideas.

Becoming a supportive partner in your relationship

The following tips are just a few suggestions that might help you become a more supportive partner for your significant other.

1. Be a good listener

Sometimes, all it takes for someone to feel better about their situation is to talk it out with a person they trust. As a partner, it can often be tempting to want to immediately give your input, but it can be important to listen without judgment and comment. Try to create a space and opportunity for your partner to feel comfortable sharing freely and openly. Before jumping in and trying to offer your opinion, you can try asking them more questions about what they’re feeling, validating their emotions, and asking what they need. 

2. Show them love

A simple "I love you" during a stressful time can often go a long way, especially if your partner’s love language is words of affirmation. Using actions to show that you love someone, in addition to vocalizing, can also show a lot of support. Some ways to show your partner that you love them might include surprising them with a coffee at work, taking them out for a night filled with events that they enjoy, or taking over certain home responsibilities so they can have some alone time. By taking the time to think of actions that would show love and care to your partner, you can help ensure that the vocalization of that love will truly be felt.

3. Ask what you can do

It can be hard for a person to express what they need from their partner amid the stress and challenging times. So instead, you can ask your significant other what you can do to help them in the future. You might ask, "What can I do to help when you get stressed?" or "Is there something I can do for you when you're sad?" Although these may seem like simple questions, they can help immensely when that time comes. Some people prefer alone time when they are sad, where others prefer to be in the presence of loved ones. Try to find out what your partner needs and wants from you ahead of time so that there is no confusion. Knowing what to do can also take some stress from you during those times.

4. Give them time and attention

Being supportive typically requires being present. While you have your own life and problems, it can be very important to make time for your significant other. Time spent together can include clear communication, physical touch, eye contact, and little to no distractions. You can have a date night out or a quiet night in regularly, have a meaningful conversation or check in daily, and remember to focus on your relationship even when things get busy.

5. Encourage new challenges and dreams

Over time, people are likely to develop new wants and desires. As this happens, it can be important to offer your support as your partner aims to achieve new goals. If your significant other expresses a desire to become a marathon runner, lose weight, or even change careers, you can be there to support their dreams. You can encourage changes that lead them towards the goal they want to meet and offer your help where they might want it. 

6. Express gratitude

Being a supportive partner can also involve letting your significant other know that you appreciate them and their actions. It can be easy to take each other for granted in some ways, especially if you’ve been together for a long time, so it may help to try to make an intentional effort to express your gratitude for them regularly. You can thank them for specific actions as well as for their overall presence and role in your life. There are many ways to express gratitude, too: you can say it in words, thank them and give a hug, or write them a card. 

7. Allow your partner to be their own person

When it comes to being supportive, it often means being present for your partner's big moments, celebrating them, spending time with them, and supporting their dreams. Even so, it can also be important to be sure to give your partner the space and freedom they need to be their own person. While you and your partner likely love spending time together and may share some common interests, being supportive can also mean allowing them to have their own interests, passions, and time for themselves. Encouraging them to be their own person can be an important aspect of offering support in a relationship. 

8. Work as a cohesive unit

Being a supportive partner can also involve knowing how to work with your significant other as a team. Doing so can create balance and an understanding between the two parties. Just as you can support your partner, they can be a support for you. This can also mean trying to tackle any conflicts that arise as a team, working together to manage the issue, rather than letting it come between you. By treating one another as equals and true partners, you can both be more supportive in your relationship. Doing so can make your relationship as a whole stronger.

Further help through online therapy

If you struggle with offering support in your relationship, you can consider seeking professional help in developing the skills and tools to do so. A qualified professional can help you see how being supportive can benefit your relationship and what steps to take to become more supportive little by little. In fact, research has found online therapy to be effective for improving both relationship and individual functioning. 

If you are trying to figure out how to be more supportive, you may find it helpful to be able to reach out for help or guidance in those moments when you’re unsure how to best be there for your partner. With online therapy through Regain, you can reach out to your therapist at any time using in-app messaging, and they will respond as soon as they can. 

Takeaway

Figuring out how to be a supportive partner in a relationship can be very important, but it isn’t always easy. There are many things you can do to be a more supportive partner, starting with some of the ideas detailed above. For further help in becoming more supportive or in navigating other relationship concerns, online therapy can help.