Signs Of Pathological Lying: How To Identify Compulsive Liars
Perhaps you’ve met someone who tells stories regularly, but you may have noticed that something does not quite add up. Maybe the person’s story contradicted something that they said previously, or it could have simply sounded too good to be true. If this sounds familiar, you may know a compulsive or pathological liar. Pathological lying is when someone lies often and for no clear reason. This article will discuss how you can spot people who lie compulsively, traits of a pathological liar, and why this complicated phenomenon happens.
What is compulsive lying?
Most everyone has lied at least once in their lifetime. In fact, lying may be considered normal behavior. It can serve different functions such as responding to or hiding from feelings of shame and guilt, for example. In some cases, lying can also be an effective way to avoid conflict or protect someone’s feelings. Lies can be harmless, or they can be destructive.
Still, some individuals may have a compulsive need to lie. Pathological liars may have a mental health condition or personality disorder that causes them to lie compulsively. For example, they could have borderline personality disorder, bipolar disorder, antisocial personality disorder, narcissistic personality disorder, or a combination of mental disorders. Their lies may seem malicious, but they can sometimes be the result of a condition that may be uncontrollable and impulsive. In some cases, the person may feel bad after lying. Other times, the person may not necessarily think they are lying, but rather telling harmless stories.
This is known as pseudologia fantastica, and the term has been around for over a century. Today, it is often referred to as compulsive lying, pathological lying, or mythomania. Despite psychiatrists and psychologists being aware of the condition for this long, pseudologia fantastica is not quite fully understood; however, it is still of interest because of its ramifications in legal settings.
In the next section, you will learn more about pseudologia fantastica and some of its traits, which can help you identify pathological lying when it arises.
Signs of compulsive lying: How to identify compulsive liars
Some people who lie compulsively think of their lies as mere "stories". Pseudologia fantastica has been described as a "matrix of fantasy interwoven with some facts". That means the “stories” of a compulsive liar may have some truth to them, but other details may be fabricated.
A compulsive liar might tell some fantastic, grandiose tale that could include enough facts to make it just believable enough to the listener. Eventually, the person on the other end might catch on and start questioning the details of the story, especially if they seem too outrageous. A person who lies compulsively might also tell many "small" lies. For example, they might lie about their employment history, how many relationships they have been in, where they grew up, etc.
If you were to approach a person you suspect is a pathological liar, they might admit that they were not telling the truth all along. When placed in such a situation, some people who lie compulsively might feel guilt and shame. This separates pathological lying from delusional thoughts and behaviors seen in various mental conditions such as schizophrenia and bipolar disorder. When a person is delusional, he or she believes what they are saying is true. In contrast, people who lie compulsively may acknowledge that what they said was false.
Lastly, these "stories" typically paint the compulsive liar in a positive light. For example, they might talk about how they rescued a cat stuck in their neighbor's tree, how they managed to meet a celebrity, or how much money they donated to charity. Speaking of money, these lies are also not usually for financial gain, but people who lie compulsively may still get some personal validation from telling them.
If you pay attention to these signs, you may be able to identify people who lie compulsively. When you meet them for the first time, it may be hard to judge whether a person is a pathological liar. Still, it may be possible to notice the cues in subsequent interactions, especially if things are not adding up.
What causes people to lie compulsively?
People who lie compulsively do not usually have any malicious intent when they lie. They may not do it on purpose either. Rather, the drive to lie could be embedded deep within their psychology. Pathological lying can have many different causes, but there are some common reasons. For example, the individual may be trying to assign meaning or importance to their lives, or they could be seeking approval from others.
In her thesis, Dr. Katie Elizabeth Treanor of the University of Wollongong describes a client who was a "confessed pathological liar" and who had a "burdensome impulse to lie". She learned from his past that he suffered from parental rejection, childhood bullying, and social ostracism, which caused him to have several maladaptive behaviors like drinking and shunning relationships; however, lying proved the most problematic for him.
The man would take on the role of someone with many attractive qualities such as being handsome, intelligent, and successful, for example. He would make up stories that allowed him to live vicariously through the persona he had created because, in reality, he felt that he was none of these things. Lying allowed him to bridge the gap between reality and fantasy. Eventually, those around him would catch on to the lies, and everything that was important to him disappeared, including his credibility and career.
Individuals who have a problem with lying may lie because they feel that they are not good enough or that they lead boring lives. However, their lying can have detrimental effects, and in some cases, can cost them their relationships or careers.
Is there a way to treat compulsive lying?
Lying compulsively, or pseudologia fantastica, was once a diagnosable mental illness, but that is no longer the case. This does not mean that pathological lying is no longer a concern. Psychiatrists stopped assigning this specific diagnosis because the condition can be a symptom of broader underlying issues such as personality disorders, for example. If you have trouble with pathological lying and think it may be a result of borerline personality, antisocial personality, narcissistic personality, or another mental health disorder, you may want to seek help from a professional. Despite the inability of those with this issue to be diagnosed, people who lie compulsively can still be treated. In fact, recovery is possible with the help of therapy.Despite the inability of those with this issue to be diagnosed, people who lie compulsively can still be treated. In fact, recovery is possible with the help of therapy.
Therapy can help address the root causes of why people who lie compulsively behave the way they do. It could also help them change the way they view themselves and their lives. Counseling can give these individuals the skills to cope with emotions such as shame, guilt, and rejection in healthier ways.
Addressing pathological lying with online therapy
Negative emotions can be both causes and effects of pathological lying and can get in the way of treatment. If you have a problem lying, you might hesitate to seek help from a therapist due to feelings of humiliation, for example. An online therapeutic setting might help you feel more at ease while discussing your compulsion to lie. This form of remote counseling can also be more convenient since you can access it anywhere you have an internet connection.
The efficacy of mental health care through online therapy
Internet-based therapy has also been proven effective in treating a variety of mental health challenges and conditions. A meta-analysis of existing research showed no significant difference in outcomes experienced by individuals receiving therapy online versus in-person. The review followed various populations and included nearly 10,000 individual cases.
Takeaway
At Regain, licensed counselors and therapists are available online to help people overcome mental health conditions that could be contributing to compulsive lying. They can employ a variety of strategies to aid you in your journey, including sending you more medically reviewed articles like this one. This could help mend relationships and improve self-esteem. Don’t wait—take the first step today to a healthier, more fulfilling life.
Frequently asked questions (FAQ)
What are the 5 signs that someone is lying?
The five signs a person is telling lies include:
- Using subconscious body language such as touching their face, mouth, or throat, for example, could indicate someone is telling lies.
- Pathological liars often repeat themselves when they lie.
- A pathological liar often pauses before they answer.
- Pathological liars may look toward the door while telling lies.
- When people lie, they often don’t blink.
Are compulsive liars born or made?
In most cases, pathological liars are made. Some people are ashamed of who they are, so they tell pathological lies to cover up insecurities. Pathological lies are characterized by grandiose admissions and stories versus white lies, which are often told by the average person to avoid hurt feelings. While a white lie is used only occasionally and with a purpose, those who lie compulsively do so often and may have no clear purpose.
What is a narcissistic liar?
A narcissistic liar is a narcissist who has an elevated sense of self they use to cover up insecurities or old wounds. They may tell grandiose lies to prop themselves up or get what they want. Narcissistic liars are known to lie and manipulate a partner in a relationship. A narcissistic liar is considered a pathological liar, as they tell compulsive lies to control people and manipulate a situation to work in their favor.
Can I learn how to identify a pathological liar?
Compulsive liars often tell unnecessary lies, even when the truth would be easier or more logical. You might be dealing with a compulsive liar if you notice someone frequently embellishing small details or creating elaborate stories for no clear reason.
What are some common signs of pathological lying?
Pathological lying often involves exaggeration and lies that seem out of place or far too detailed. People may contradict themselves frequently or tell stories that just don’t add up without any obvious reason to lie.
Is there a difference between the behavior of a compulsive liar and a pathological liar?
Yes, there is a subtle difference. Compulsive liars lie out of habit—sometimes without even realizing it—while pathological liars usually have a motive, often to manipulate or control a situation. The intention behind the lies is key.
Is pathological lying linked to certain mental health conditions?
Yes, pathological lying can sometimes be linked to other mental health conditions like personality disorders (e.g., narcissistic or borderline personality disorder). It can also be a symptom of deeper issues, such as low self-esteem or anxiety.
More commonly asked questions
Is it possible to learn how to identify compulsive liars?
Compulsive liars may mask their lying behind charming or overly confident behavior. They often try to make their lies more believable by acting extra friendly or by over-explaining things. Paying attention to inconsistencies in their stories can help you identify them.
How does compulsive lying affect mental health?
Compulsive lying can take a toll on a person’s mental health. It often creates stress, anxiety, and guilt, especially when lies catch up with them. It can also damage their relationships, leading to isolation and feelings of worthlessness.
What types of behavior are typical of a pathological liar?
A pathological liar often tells grand, elaborate stories that seem designed to impress or manipulate others. They may shift their behavior depending on who they are talking to, adjusting their lies to fit their audience.
What mental health conditions are associated with pathological lying?
Pathological lying can deeply impact mental health by fostering an unstable sense of reality. It can cause anxiety, guilt, and even depression. The constant pressure to keep track of lies can also be exhausting and lead to emotional burnout.
What are the major behavioral traits of compulsive liars?
Compulsive liars usually lie without much thought, even when there’s nothing to gain. They might lie about trivial things—like what they had for breakfast—and often seem unable to stop themselves. This behavior often leaves them stuck in a cycle of more lies to cover previous ones.
Are there specific disorders that can lead to compulsive lying?
Yes, conditions like impulse control disorders or certain personality disorders can contribute to compulsive lying. It’s often a way for people to cope with low self-esteem or to avoid facing uncomfortable truths about themselves.
How can pathological lying impact personal and social behavior?
Pathological lying can severely damage relationships. Friends and family may find it hard to trust someone who lies constantly, which can lead to isolation. Socially, pathological liars may struggle because their lies often come back to haunt them, making it hard to maintain genuine connections.
What mental health challenges are associated with being a pathological liar?
Pathological liars often struggle with low self-esteem, anxiety, and, in some cases, depression. Their behavior can also lead to social isolation, which makes these mental health issues even worse. They may also face challenges related to personality disorders, which further complicates their emotional well-being.
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