Four Skills Every Parent Needs To Raise Successful Kids

Most parents want to see their children grow up healthy, happy, and successful. They ultimately want the best for their offspring and tend to view them in high regard. However, children require proper care and guidance from their parents to grow into the healthiest and most successful versions of themselves.

Perhaps one of the best ways parents can set their children up for success is by implementing the proper parenting skills. Before addressing these, it could be important to understand exactly what it means to be a parent.

What does it mean to be a parent?

Essentially, a parent is defined as "one that begets or brings forth offspring" and "a person who brings up and cares for another". Bringing up and caring for children is a lifelong commitment that takes work. Parenting is multidimensional and involves providing for one's child, shielding them from harm, teaching them, and placing their needs before one's own.

Despite all these responsibilities, it may also be important for parents to know when to let go. This can be somewhat challenging for parents, especially as their children grow up. Once children reach a certain age, they may need to experience certain things independently and learn from their own mistakes. 

Many people mistakenly believe that young children are less aware of their environment than their older counterparts, but this may not be accurate. Even small children notice the behaviors, words, and actions in their environment. If negative behaviors are frequently displayed to them, children can pick up on some bad habits. Conversely, children exposed to positive influences and behaviors are more likely to imitate those behaviors.

Critical parenting skills

Most parents have an innate desire to help their children thrive. Still, they may need more than just good intentions to have a positive impact on their kids. Here are some of the critical parenting skills moms and dads may need:

Responsibility

Perhaps one of the best things parents can do for their children is to teach them to be responsible individuals. Responsibility is a trait that may serve children well in all aspects of life. Responsible individuals are considerably more likely than their irresponsible counterparts to succeed in life.

There may be many ways for parents to help their children grow into responsible adults. One of these strategies is to have kids clean up after themselves once they’re old enough to do so. As basic a task as this is, it could serve as a gateway for children to learn the merits of responsibility.

Children who are asked to clean up after themselves may learn that their consequences have actions, and that they are responsible for these actions. For instance, someone who makes a mess will have to clean the mess up. This concept can apply to both literal and metaphorical messes. Sometimes, parents make the mistake of  swooping in and cleaning up their kids' messes, which can rob them of this important lesson.

They may do this with the best of intentions, but the impacts of this choice can be harmful. Children who are never made to clean up their messes may grow up to believe that their parents are responsible for doing damage control for them. 

Communication

Communication is another critical parenting skill that can impact how well children do in life. Not only does communicating help children learn new skills and knowledge, but it can also teach them effective ways of interacting with others. How young people interact with others can impact how other people perceive them, which jobs they end up attaining, and whether they achieve certain goals in life. Therefore, parents are responsible for modeling appropriate behavior and teaching their children how to communicate with others.

As children grow and mature, they may take cues from their parents on the appropriate ways to communicate with others. Depending on how parents communicate with their children (and others), these cues can have positive or negative effects. For instance, children who grow up around parents who frequently scream and swear when angry or frustrated might adopt these same habits. Conversely, young people who grow up with parents who can calmly and effectively communicate, even in the midst of a conflict, may learn these important communication skills and use them in their own relationships in the future. 

Morality

Morality may be another important parenting skill. This is because, similarly to responsibility and communication, moral character is another trait that children will pick up on from observing their parents. Integrity, kindness, respect, and courage are some of the many moral values that parents can teach to their children.

It may be difficult for children to learn the value of morality in this day and age, especially since parents are not their only influences. For example, various forms of media in our society may encourage people to break the rules or engage in reprimandable behavior, especially if they can get away with it. Perhaps the best way for parents to keep their children from going down a dangerous path is to teach them to behave admirably by treating others with respect, showing integrity, and being leaders, not followers.

Discipline

Discipline is arguably one of the most controversial parenting skills. Different parents may have different ideas on the appropriate ways to discipline their children. Still, discipline may be essential for children because it teaches them important lessons about boundaries, consequences, and accountability. 

Parents can sometimes make the mistake of either disciplining their children too much or not often enough. Both mistakes can have adverse impacts later in life. Children who are always coddled and given what they want may grow up to believe the world will treat them as their parents did during their formative years. Realizing this is not the case can be a harsh lesson.

On the other hand, the effects of punishing children severely can be just as bad or worse. Overdoing disciplinary behaviors can cause kids to rebel against their parents. Children may adopt the mindset of "I have nothing to lose, so why should I listen?" Parents may discipline their children with the best of intentions, but a balance of compassion and clear boundaries may be best. Like most scenarios, extremes on either end of the spectrum may be detrimental.

The challenges of parenting

Parenting is sometimes characterized as a natural role that moms and dads take on when their children are born. That might make it seem like it’s always easy, but there will be good times and bad times. There will also be instances where parents wonder if they are doing the right thing or truly setting their children up for success. Mistakes may be made along the way, and that is okay. 

Parents sometimes feel like they’re alone in raising their children, but this doesn’t have to be the case. A good support system can make a significant difference, especially when you’re tired, frustrated, or you’re facing a unique parenting challenge. Trusted relatives and friends may be able to provide you with the support you need. If you find you need more assistance, though, consider professional counseling. 

Counseling for parents

Even in modern society, counseling is sometimes unfairly stigmatized, especially for parents. This can make moms and dads feel like they’re failures if they need outside help when raising their children. Online counseling may be a better alternative in these cases. You can start sessions from the comfort of your home. Plus, many people report that this type of counseling is more conducive to sensitive discussions about child-rearing. 

Online mental health services have been proven effective many times over by researchers in the field of mental health.  A recent study demonstrated the benefits of online parenting programs, including a decrease in parenting stress and depression. These same programs were found to lessen child anxiety, behavior problems, and negative parent-child interactions. 

Takeaway

Parenting can be overwhelming, especially in contemporary society. The benefits of seeking out help and guidance can make a considerable difference. If you’re still hesitant to pursue counseling, it could be helpful to keep in mind that asking for help is a sign of emotional maturity and self-awareness. The compassionate and professional counselors here at Regain are waiting to hear from you—reach out and start moving towards your parenting goals.