Want to learn more about emotional manipulation?

Emotional manipulation is a form of emotional abuse. Learn techniques emotionally manipulative people use like guilt-tripping & its mental health effects.

Six Emotional Manipulation Techniques And How To Recognize And Stop Them | Regain

<p dir="ltr"><strong>Frequently asked questions (FAQs)</strong></p>
<p dir="ltr"><strong>What is considered emotional manipulation?</strong></p>
<p dir="ltr">Emotional manipulation occurs when someone attempts to have domain over another person using exploitative strategies. It can come in various forms, but they have in common that the emotionally manipulative person will usually attempt to belittle you in some way.&nbsp;<a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/33746811/">Emotional manipulators&nbsp;</a>can be masters of coercing people into believing that they are under their control, using techniques like emotional bullying, passive aggression, guilt, and comparison to get what they want.</p>
<p dir="ltr"><strong>How do you recognize emotional manipulation?</strong></p>
<p dir="ltr">Being able to recognize the signs of emotional manipulation appropriately is crucial to escaping the situation. An emotional manipulator can tend to get close to you quickly, engaging in tactics like love-bombing to help you feel cared for. They may also twist the facts of a story, often focusing on emotional purposes to guilt you into feeling bad for them or to paint you as a bad person. If you find yourself consistently questioning your reality around someone, apologizing to them for things that either didn&rsquo;t happen or that you&rsquo;re not at fault for, or feeling as though you must walk on eggshells around them because you&rsquo;re unsure of how they may react to just about anything, this person may be emotionally manipulating you.&nbsp;</p>
<p dir="ltr"><strong>What are examples of manipulation?</strong></p>
<p dir="ltr">Emotionally manipulative individuals may often use guilt, sympathy, anger, and sarcasm to influence your thinking. They may also threaten you, purposely withhold information from you, and even isolate you from your loved ones as a way to keep you somehow reliant on the. In an emotionally abusive relationship, some tactics that they use can include gaslighting, the use of sex, and dishonesty.</p>
<p dir="ltr"><strong>How do you know if you&rsquo;re being gaslit?</strong></p>
<p dir="ltr"><a href="https://www.thehotline.org/resources/what-is-gaslighting/">Gaslighting</a> is a common tactic used by emotionally manipulative people. It focuses on gradual emotional wear and tear by making you question your thoughts, events around you, and your memories. If you&rsquo;re being gaslit, you may notice an increase in your anxiety with a subsequent decrease in your confidence. You may question everything you do and think everything is your fault, leading you to apologize for things that you shouldn&rsquo;t. It can also lead to a massive increase in difficulty when it comes to making decisions. You may often feel as if you&rsquo;re disassociating from your old self and cannot pinpoint what is wrong. In more severe cases, you might even make excuses for your partner&rsquo;s behavior and avoid telling friends or family about them to avoid confrontation. If you recognize any of these signs, you should seek help right away.</p>
<p dir="ltr"><strong>Is manipulating someone illegal?</strong></p>
<p dir="ltr"><a href="https://www.law.cornell.edu/uscode/text/7/9">Manipulating someone is illegal.</a> The tricky part is that it can be difficult for prosecutors to pinpoint any manipulation since the signs can often be subtle. For this reason, dealing with emotionally manipulative people can often be difficult. The evidence is often not concrete since the abuse is typically not physically visible, which can make it tough to hold up in court. If you&rsquo;re dealing with emotional manipulation currently and you can recognize the signs, don&rsquo;t hesitate to seek advice and legal counsel.</p>
<p dir="ltr"><strong>Is gaslighting emotional abuse?</strong></p>
<p dir="ltr">Gaslighting is often a staple of emotionally abusive relationships. It is widely considered a kind of emotional abuse and one of the primary signs of emotional manipulation. Emotionally abusive people will often use this and other tactics to try and seize control of a relationship.</p>

When you love someone, you tend to view them through an idealistic lens that blinds you to their negative traits. When it’s something innocuous, like nail-biting or leaving...

Six Emotional Manipulation Techniques And How To Recognize And Stop Them

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<div><strong>Content warning:</strong> Please be advised, the below article might mention trauma-related topics that include abuse which could be triggering to the reader. If you or someone you love is experiencing abuse, contact the<strong> </strong><a href="https://www.thehotline.org/" target="_blank" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer">Domestic Violence Hotline</a> at <strong>1-800-799-SAFE (7233)</strong>. Support is available 24/7. Please also see our <a href="https://www.betterhelp.com/gethelpnow/" rel="nofollow noreferrer">Get Help Now</a> page for more immediate resources.</div>
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<p dir="ltr">Relationships, whether they&rsquo;re familial, platonic, or romantic, can often be considered the bedrock of being a human. We are, to some degree, set apart from other mammals and animals for the way we interact with the others of our species, and the homes and lives we create for ourselves in conjunction with others. Relationships can therefore be a significant part of almost every human being's life, regardless of the exact presentation of those relationships. It is perhaps for this reason that spotting serious relationship red flags can often be difficult, if not altogether impossible, and that so many people find themselves in relationships that involve abuse, neglect, or bullying. Below, we&rsquo;ll explore signs of manipulation in relationships.</p>
<h2 dir="ltr">What is manipulation?</h2>
<figure class="image"><img src="https://dy7glz37jgl0b.cloudfront.net/advice/images/86116914dd75d0bca0e86a8f63815ffd-man-in-green-hoodie-holds-phone-angry-at-partner-in-bed_l.jpg" alt="A man in a green hoodie turns his back on his partner while holding his cellphone with an angry expression as his sad partner turns towards him." width="905" height="603">
<figcaption>Getty</figcaption><div class='article-cta article_cta  '><div class='article_cta_container'><div role='heading' aria-level='2' class='article_cta_text'>Are you experiencing manipulation in your relationship?</div><div class='embedded-cta-container'><a href='/get-started/' data-cta-count='0' class='btn btn-primary embedded-cta'>Get help from a licensed therapist</a></div></div></div>
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<p dir="ltr">Manipulation can be defined as behavior that seeks to control or sway another person's beliefs, ideas, behavior, or view of reality. Manipulation is not relegated to romantic relationships but can permeate virtually every relationship in existence; friendships, authoritative relationships, familial relationships, parent-child relationships, and more. Authority figures, such as government representatives, can use manipulation, as can teachers and mentors.&nbsp;</p>
<p dir="ltr">In many cases, manipulation can be small and infrequent, such as twisting your words to get your way with a store clerk. Or it can be huge and constant, such as a parent consistently using guilt to get their way with their child. Manipulation can be a form of mental, emotional, and psychological abuse, and can cause harm in unexpected and far-reaching ways. Being aware of&nbsp;<a href="https://www.regain.us/advice/domestic-violence/am-i-being-manipulated-in-my-relationship-17-signs-to-recognize-and-what-to-do-about-it/">signs of manipulation in a relationship</a>&nbsp;can help you avoid living with its consequences.</p>
<h2 dir="ltr">How damaging are manipulative relationships?</h2>
<p dir="ltr">Emotional manipulation can be extremely damaging to a person&rsquo;s mental health and may lead to&nbsp;<a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/17456916211011963">emotional and mental uncertainty and instability</a>. These kinds of relationships can create trust issues and make you question your reality or sanity. Likewise, manipulation can act as a catalyst for depression and anxiety and can pave an ideal road for other, similar conditions to develop.</p>
<p dir="ltr">People in manipulative relationships may begin to doubt themselves and might struggle to separate themselves from their&nbsp;<a href="https://www.regain.us/advice/general/what-does-an-emotionally-manipulative-partner-look-like/">emotionally manipulative partner</a>. This can be dangerous because losing a concrete sense of self can foster codependence and make you far more entwined with your abuser than you may have been before. Typically, people getting out of a manipulative relationship need time, distance, and therapy to sort through the damage of manipulation, create healthy boundaries, and move forward.</p>
<h2 dir="ltr">Relationships and manipulation: What using looks like</h2>
<p dir="ltr">It can be hard to detect if you are being used, especially if the person who is using you is skilled at it. Using people often starts out small and simple; a boss might come to you, seemingly on edge, and implore you to take a coworker's shift, because there "just isn't anyone else." Or a friend might beg you to stay with them instead of going home and getting some work done, because they need you, and don't have anyone else. Although both of these can be true, they can also both begin to groom you for a series of manipulative behaviors. Below we&rsquo;ll outline a few manipulation tactics that might be used in relationships.</p>
<h3 dir="ltr">Guilt</h3>
<p dir="ltr">Manipulation can manifest via&nbsp;<a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/3598864/">multiple tactics</a>, but guilt is often one of the more common ones. Manipulators often use guilt to make you feel as though you must do or say something specific and to keep you in a relationship you may be eager to leave. Guilt may be borne of desperation or maybe used because it has worked with others in the past. Although guilt may be more commonly used in intimate relationships (close friendships, familial relationships, or partnerships), it can be used in other settings, including school, sales, and work.</p>
<h3 dir="ltr">Gaslighting</h3>
<p dir="ltr">Gaslighting can also be a common form of manipulation, as it twists and controls the way that you think. It may make you question your own beliefs and experiences or lead you to believe your own reality and memories aren&rsquo;t true.&nbsp;Sometimes, people use gaslighting to divert attention away from themselves when they&rsquo;ve hurt someone else. A person who gaslights may manipulate a situation to try and make the other person doubt their own feelings or memories. They may do this to try and make the other person feel guilty for bringing up their feelings and to avoid taking responsibility for their hurtful actions.</p>
<h3 dir="ltr">Stonewalling or giving the silent treatment</h3>
<p dir="ltr">The silent treatment may be another type of manipulation commonly used in relationships. The silent treatment occurs when one person in the relationship refuses to speak to the other until the other person gives in to break the silence. The silent treatment can be considered a form of passive aggressive behavior that&rsquo;s used to manipulate someone else, because it is controlling behavior that might seek to force someone else's hand. Passive aggressive behavior can be considered a silent form of manipulative, because it&rsquo;s an indirect way of communicating that can be used to cause tension or provoke another person. Oftentimes, the silent treatment is used until the person who is being manipulated comes to the manipulator and apologizes or concedes.</p>
<h3 dir="ltr">Love Bombing</h3>
<p dir="ltr">Love bombing is a type of emotional manipulation often used at the beginning of relationships. When someone love bombs another persons, they tend to give them an excessive amount of attention in the form of affection, compliments, and gifts. After an initial period of grand displays of affection, someone who love bombs may disappear completely or become cold.&nbsp; They may become critical and start to belittle their partner.&nbsp;</p>
<h2 dir="ltr">Why do people use and manipulate?</h2>
<figure class="image"><img src="https://dy7glz37jgl0b.cloudfront.net/advice/images/c2d24386adc8d086e40939b03f2089a3-woman-cries-while-sitting-outside-with-her-partner-at-a-cafe_l.jpg" alt="A woman with long gray hair and a pinik sweater holds her hand to her eyes while sitting outside with a woman who has short gray hair and a plaid coat. " width="908" height="605">
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<p dir="ltr">Being used by someone else is not always a malicious move on their part. Some people may use others without seeming to realize it and use people almost as a matter of course. These people might only seek out connection with their friends when they need something, might only reach out if they are in crisis, or might only invite certain people to go places with them if they cannot find anything else they'd prefer to spend time with. On the surface, it might not seem like such a strange or terrible thing to do, but using other people to assuage your loneliness without consideration of the other person can be form of using someone.</p>
<p dir="ltr">Some people may manipulate because it is the primary mechanism through which they were taught to connect with other people. If you grew up in a household characterized by abuse (including manipulation), it might be the only way you know how to keep up relationships with others.</p>
<p dir="ltr">Some people with a personality disorder may have difficulty maintaining healthy relationships and may be more likely to engage in manipulative or controlling behavior in relationships.&nbsp;</p>
<h2 dir="ltr">Is manipulation always bad?</h2>
<p dir="ltr">Overall, manipulation can have a very negative connotation and is usually viewed as abusive or inappropriate behavior. This is because any form of control or coercion of someone can be seen as problematic; if someone is pushed to do or say something they do not want to do or say, it may be considered control and manipulation and can quickly grow dangerous.</p>
<p dir="ltr">Despite some arguments to the contrary, most mental health professionals would likely agree that manipulation is, on the whole, a bad thing. Healthy relationships do not usually involve manipulation, nor do healthy mindsets employ this type of control over others. Even if the victim of manipulation seems actually to benefit from the manipulation momentarily, the means of arriving at that benefit can be viewed as unacceptable. There can be plenty of other ways to achieve a goal or form a strong relationship without employing controlling tactics.</p>
<h2 dir="ltr">What to do if you're being used or manipulated</h2>
<p dir="ltr">If you are being used or manipulated, the best thing to do may be to get out of the situation. Whether it is your job, your class, your friendship, or your relationship, removing yourself from a manipulative situation or relationship is usually the best option. If your supervisor is behaving in a manipulative way, try to switch to another supervisor. If a friend is manipulating you, request that the two of you take some time apart. Gaining some distance may be one of the best ways to begin healing, as it can open your eyes to some of the more difficult-to-recognize patterns you've been exposed to.</p>
<p><img src="https://dy7glz37jgl0b.cloudfront.net/advice/images/regain/554d1b6b61986d441e91f7f632cc94ca-sad-man-holds-mug_l.jpg" alt="A man in an orange shirt sits sadly on the couch with his partner and gazes down into his cup of coffee." width="903" height="609"><div class='article-cta article_cta  '><div class='article_cta_container'><div role='heading' aria-level='2' class='article_cta_text'>Are you experiencing manipulation in your relationship?</div><div class='embedded-cta-container'><a href='/get-started/' data-cta-count='2' class='btn btn-primary embedded-cta'>Get help from a licensed therapist</a></div></div></div></p>
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<p dir="ltr">If getting away from the situation is not possible, seeking help from a therapist can be a wonderful next step. A therapist can help you assess your situation and create a series of steps to either limit the effects of manipulation or get out of the situation altogether. Therapists can help you set healthy boundaries, identify any patterns of behavior that are inappropriate for your user, and identify methods you can employ to minimize your exposure to manipulation. These can include talking and engagement methods, as many manipulators and users feed off of the reactions of their targets.</p>
<h2 dir="ltr">Getting help for relationships and manipulation</h2>
<p dir="ltr">Manipulation can, unfortunately, be common in virtually every type of human interaction there is. Although this can be disheartening, there are some ways you can minimize your exposure to manipulative behavior and create healthy coping and communication methods to use in response.</p>
<p dir="ltr">Speaking to a professional via&nbsp;<a href="about:blank">online therapy</a>&nbsp;can be an especially easy way to build skills to combat manipulation, all from the comfort of your own home. When you work with an online therapist, you can avoid costly commutes to and from in-person offices. You can join your sessions from anywhere you can find an internet connection.</p>
<p dir="ltr">An online format may also make it more likely that you&rsquo;ll feel able to open up to and connect with your therapist. One&nbsp;<a href="https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2019.02992/full">recent study</a>&nbsp;suggests that many people feel their ability to connect with and trust their therapist is enhanced by the distance an online platform can create. In other words, many clients feel more comfortable sharing more, perhaps including details about manipulation, with their therapists when they meet via the web.</p>
<h2 dir="ltr">Takeaway</h2>
<p dir="ltr">Manipulation can be thought of as any behavior that attempts to control or scare a person into acting a certain way. It may be present in relationships that are toxic or abusive. Setting boundaries, limiting communication methods, and standing firm in your beliefs and experiences can help avoid the effects of manipulation, as can creating a strong, firm support system.</p>
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Are you experiencing manipulation in your relationship?

Relationships and manipulation – the first can be a space to play out manipulative behaviors like the silent treatment and being passive aggressive.

Relationships And Manipulation: Am I Being Used? | Regain

Relationships, whether they’re familial, platonic, or romantic, can often be considered the bedrock of being a human. We are, to some degree, set apart from other mammals and...

Relationships And Manipulation: Am I Being Used?

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<p dir="ltr">Romantic relationships are often complex, causing intense emotions and attachments. In some cases, people may behave manipulatively in relationships due to intense emotions and a lack of understanding of what healthy behaviors look like in a relationship. Being able to pick up on manipulation may help you know when to set boundaries, talk to your partner, seek couples counseling, or decide to let go. In some cases, manipulation is a form of abuse. If you&rsquo;re experiencing abuse, getting help can be crucial. Below, learn ways to identify these tactics and find support. &nbsp;</p>
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<h2 dir="ltr">What is emotional manipulation?&nbsp;</h2>
<p dir="ltr">Emotional manipulation is a behavioral tactic aimed at getting someone to believe something or do what a person wants without directly asking them. Some people may knowingly use manipulation, whereas it may be more subconscious for others. Often, these techniques are used as a form of control over another person. Emotional manipulation uses someone&rsquo;s emotions and thoughts to attempt to control them. This behavior can be challenging to identify, especially if not taught about healthy relationship patterns.&nbsp;</p>
<h2 dir="ltr">Is emotional manipulation a form of abuse?&nbsp;</h2>
<p dir="ltr"><span style="font-size: 12.5pt; line-height: 107%; font-family: 'Arial',sans-serif; mso-fareast-font-family: Aptos; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA;">Emotional manipulation can be part of abuse in some cases. This behavior may also escalate to abuse. Infrequent or occasional manipulation is toxic but not necessarily abusive. The United Nations (UN) <a href="https://www.un.org/en/coronavirus/what-is-domestic-abuse">defines abuse</a> as &ldquo;a pattern of behavior in any relationship used to gain or maintain power and control over an intimate partner.&rdquo; Abuse can be emotional, physical, sexual, financial, economic, or spiritual and often involves threats, manipulation, and targeted behavior that frightens, hurts, humiliates, harms, or injures someone else. Abuse can occur to anyone of any race, ethnicity, age, gender, sexuality, class, or background. In addition, abuse can occur between people who aren&rsquo;t in a romantic relationship, such as roommates or family. Often, emotional manipulation is a warning sign of emotional abuse. </span></p>
<h2 dir="ltr">Eight types of emotional manipulation to look out for in a relationship&nbsp;</h2>
<p class="MsoNormal">If you think you might be experiencing emotional manipulation or want to look out for patterns to be wary of, consider the following eight types of manipulation.</p>
<p dir="ltr"><img src="https://lh7-us.googleusercontent.com/docsz/AD_4nXfe5XswjlddpbviYdpKYagQCnkaWE711JEAojPDLnRKqMbvGrsEpDcT3V1MjdtZUk_mdtWk-zb7WT5GqYrSQv5oOiRoNLtRTUYTGcchAfRJTuf-3gWP-oaG5rHU0H6_NQUlHhIR5oqTU2ENoJUvBoUWxiiag9NM2adwVu-oALb6YOKwYn2JGA?key=HZzTSxvdUdAltp_ScNvSUw" alt="A person drinking from a cup while using a computer

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<h3 dir="ltr">Gaslighting&nbsp;</h3>
<p class="MsoNormal">The National Domestic Violence Hotline defines <a href="https://www.thehotline.org/resources/what-is-gaslighting/">gaslighting</a> as behavior in which a person withholds information, blocks, trivializes, and denies someone&rsquo;s experiences. For example, someone might be gaslighting you if they tell you that you didn&rsquo;t take the trash out yesterday when you know you did. They might use gaslighting on minor events like these or in bigger conversations, such as conversations about past arguments. They might say, &ldquo;I don&rsquo;t remember doing that,&rdquo; to minimize their behavior. This type of emotional manipulation is a significant sign of emotional abuse, especially when paired with other controlling behaviors.</p>
<h3>Love-bombing</h3>
<p class="MsoNormal"><a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2022/01/10/style/love-bombing.html">Love-bombing</a> is a red flag for abuse and involves showering an individual with attention, love, and kindness, often before using other forms of manipulation to control them. Love-bombing is not just an expression of grand love. Instead, it is loving behavior meant to manipulate someone else&rsquo;s actions. For example, someone who has mistreated their partner might love-bomb by overly apologizing, buying lots of gifts, and attempting to make them not upset. They might use phrases like, &ldquo;I got you flowers, so why won&rsquo;t you forgive me?&rdquo; Love-bombing can also happen at the beginning of a relationship.</p>
<h3>Guilt-tripping</h3>
<p class="MsoNormal">Guilt-tripping is behavior meant to elicit guilt in another person, even if they haven&rsquo;t done anything wrong. For example, someone might say, &ldquo;You never give me support, even though I constantly support you.&rdquo; Guilt-tripping is also an attempt to minimize someone&rsquo;s experiences or to change the conversation back to the person who is being manipulative.</p>
<h3>The silent treatment</h3>
<p class="MsoNormal">The silent treatment is a technique used to ignore another person&rsquo;s emotional expression or to &ldquo;punish&rdquo; someone. In this technique, a person completely ignores the other person over text and potentially in person, as well. Someone might also go silent during a conversation to avoid having to respond. This technique may be associated with an avoidant attachment style.</p>
<h3>Triangulation</h3>
<p class="MsoNormal">Triangulation is a technique in which a person involves a third party in a conflict between them and their partner. They might also tell the other person lies to get them on their side and manipulate their partner into thinking they&rsquo;re wrong. Triangulation can also take the form of cyberbullying or mass group cancellations.</p>
<h3>Controlling</h3>
<p class="MsoNormal">Controlling behavior regarding emotions may be emotional manipulation. For example, a partner telling you what you can and can&rsquo;t wear or who you can talk to is a form of control. This type of control is abusive.</p>
<h3>A lack of respect</h3>
<p class="MsoNormal">A lack of respect can be used to emotionally manipulate someone by withholding affection or kindness. This technique can also be a sign of emotional abuse in relationships. If your partner is not respecting you, talk to someone you trust.</p>
<h3>Lying</h3>
<p class="MsoNormal">Lying can be a form of gaslighting but can also be used as a manipulation tactic. Someone may lie to avoid taking responsibility for their actions or hide behaviors they don&rsquo;t want their partner to know about. Lying can lead to a lack of trust and a broken connection.</p>
<p dir="ltr"><img src="https://lh7-us.googleusercontent.com/docsz/AD_4nXfT9lSQv9XfncwhiLX2NFVy0FFJg6l_IZy3kCPgqin2qJZfKpz426rnKLT-2OVx7TyhSKc8uf3BXhlI5YLV6xOVFyccH7MxeeLZ57hZ0G2FcGtjQtdYETi27ryhPWvCurEj2aPZOv2A4XAcpO3QNrFJIRlgiQpfMO7GJKOmyexihdzYcNqFGQ?key=HZzTSxvdUdAltp_ScNvSUw" alt="A person smiling and pointing at something

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<h2>How to proceed</h2>
<p class="MsoNormal">If someone you love uses manipulation tactics against you, you&rsquo;re not alone. You might be at risk for emotional abuse, so talking to someone can be crucial. Below are a few steps you can take to address the manipulation.</p>
<h3>Talk to someone you trust</h3>
<p class="MsoNormal">Tell someone in your life what&rsquo;s happening in your relationship. They might not be aware of the extent of the manipulation. Be sure this person is someone you can trust who doesn&rsquo;t have much contact with your partner. If they are close to your partner, they might tell them what you said, which can be dangerous. If you don&rsquo;t have anyone you trust because of social isolation or another reason, you might try going to a free support group for abuse in your area to learn more about signs of abuse and to talk about what you&rsquo;re experiencing. You can also call the Domestic Violence Hotline.</p>
<h3>End the relationship</h3>
<p class="MsoNormal">If a person frequently uses manipulation tactics with you, your relationship may not be healthy. Ending a relationship because of manipulation is normal and okay, and you&rsquo;re not alone. However, manipulation and potential abuse can make leaving more difficult. In these cases, calling a hotline or talking to someone you trust may be helpful. You can also speak to a therapist about what you&rsquo;re going through and practice the phrases you want to use when breaking up with your partner. You might also try couples therapy if you&rsquo;re not ready to end the relationship or want to work it out with them.</p>
<h3>Talk to a professional</h3>
<p class="MsoNormal">A professional, whether an individual or couples therapist, can help clients understand relationship conflicts. In couples therapy, couples can discuss healthier communication techniques, learn how to address disagreements, and avoid controlling behavior. In individual therapy, clients can learn to set boundaries, end relationships, and cope with challenging emotions. People who use manipulation tactics in their relationships may also benefit from therapy to learn healthier ways to get their needs met.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">If you face barriers to in-person therapy, you might try online counseling through a platform like <a href="http://www.betterhelp.com/get-started/">BetterHelp</a> for individuals or <a href="http://www.regain.us/get-started/">Regain</a> for couples. Online treatment for couples has been proven effective, with clients reporting <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6985577/">greater satisfaction</a> over video therapy than face-to-face options. In addition, online therapy can be more cost-effective, and you can choose between phone, video, or live chat sessions, giving you more control over how you receive support.</p>
<h2 dir="ltr">Takeaway</h2>
<p class="MsoNormal">Emotional manipulation is a toxic strategy used in relationships to get someone to act in a certain way. Manipulation can be a warning sign of emotional abuse, so understanding the signs of this behavior may be helpful for individuals in any type of relationship. If you&rsquo;d like to explore healthy relationship patterns in more depth, consider contacting a therapist online or in your area.</p>
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Emotional manipulation is a control tactic. Learn how to recognize this type of  behavior in a romantic relationship and how to find help.

Nine Emotional Manipulation Signs To Watch Out For When You’re In A Relationship | Regain

<p><strong>Frequently asked questions (FAQs)&nbsp;</strong></p>
<h2><strong>What is emotionally manipulative?</strong></h2>
<p>There are a number of things that are considered emotionally manipulative or signs of manipulation. Gaslighting, stonewalling, lying, changing the subject, or deflecting your concerns when you bring up an important issue, and emotional blackmail are all forms of emotional manipulation. An emotional manipulator may also prey on your insecurities and turn their bad behavior around on you to feel that everything is your fault. The very nature of psychological and emotional manipulation is that emotional manipulators or people who manipulate others will manipulate you not to identify manipulation. To identify manipulation, it's important to know the signs and listen to your gut. As much as you don't want to believe that a particular person could be an emotional manipulator, recognize the signs of psychological and emotional manipulation for what they are. See an emotional manipulator's actions above all else. A very common tactic used by emotional manipulators or an emotionally manipulative person is <a href="https://www.lexico.com/en/definition/love-bomb">love bombing</a>&nbsp;when someone bombards you with excessive affection. Often, this is so that you think of the good times and think to yourself, "it's not all bad," causing you to stick around. Someone may also use love bombing to deflect from their poor behavior; if they shower you with affection, you'll think, "wow, they're really into me," instead of seeing the warning signs that might be there. Especially if this is a new relationship and someone engages in excessive, overwhelming, intense displays of affection too soon, this is a big red flag.</p>
<h2><strong>What are examples of emotional manipulation?</strong></h2>
<p>The APA defines <a href="https://dictionary.apa.org/manipulation">manipulation</a> as "behavior designed to exploit, control, or otherwise influence others to one's advantage." Emotional manipulation is a specific form of manipulation that refers to manipulating others by targeting people's emotions. When someone manipulates people's emotions, they may be doing it for a number of reasons - to gain control, to get what they want, or to avoid responsibility for their actions - but it is never okay. Being able to identify manipulation can help you avoid it, or at the very least, recognize it so that you can reduce the harm done by emotional manipulation. If you are manipulated emotionally, you did not sign up to receive emotional manipulation, and it is not your fault. Emotional manipulators or people who manipulate others are often very good at what they do. At times, they may hide it under the guise of care or concern. An emotional manipulator might manipulate another person by making them believe that they aren't capable or cannot trust themselves. If you're searching for "manipulation signs," "how to recognize emotional manipulators," or "mental and emotional manipulation signs," you can read about the signs of psychological and emotional manipulation below.</p>
<h2><strong>What are signs of manipulation?</strong></h2>
<p>Signs of manipulation to look out for include:</p>
<ul>
<li>Gaslighting (making you question your reality).</li>
<li>Deflecting blame (making you feel as though "it's all your fault" or that "if you were different, the relationship would be better.")</li>
<li>Stonewalling (giving you the silent treatment).</li>
<li>Emotional blackmail (when someone uses fear, obligation, and guilt to get what they want).</li>
<li>Withholding affection (this may go along with emotional blackmail).</li>
<li>Love bombing (showering you with excessive affection and praise, often distracting from red flags or other abusive and manipulative behaviors).</li>
</ul>
<p>If you see the signs of manipulation in your relationship or think that you may be encountering psychological or emotional manipulation, listen to your gut. Unfortunately, mental and emotional manipulation is not uncommon, and it is something that many people encounter. The psychological impact of emotional manipulation is genuine, and if you've faced it, you're not alone.</p>
<h2><strong>What are examples of manipulation?</strong></h2>
<p>After reading the signs of manipulation above, you may wonder what exactly they look like. Here are some examples of psychological and emotional manipulation:</p>
<ul>
<li>Emotional blackmail. You have to do this for me."</li>
<li>Deflecting blame. Say that a partner yells at you and calls you names, and when you say, "I don't like it when you call me that name" or express concerns about the name-calling and raising of their voice, they say, "I wouldn't have to do that if you weren't dumb/if you weren't like this/if you listened to me/etc." Emotional manipulators do this so that they don't have to take responsibility. The emotional manipulator can instead turn the blame to you so that their behavior is never addressed.</li>
<li>Let's say that you take care of all of the bills or household chores. Alternatively, let's say that you said "no" to a sexual act that makes you feel very uncomfortable. An example of stonewalling would be that your partner gives you the silent treatment, refuses to talk about the topic, or gets angry and walks away when you bring up the proposal that they help with the bills and chores or say "no" to said sexual act. They're doing this so that you stop bringing up your concerns or stop saying "no" so that you do not have to face the silent treatment or anger again and will instead do what they want or treat you the way they want without discourse or discussion.</li>
</ul>
<h3><strong>Is gaslighting emotional abuse?</strong></h3>
<p>Gaslighting is indeed an emotional abuse tactic, and it is not something to ignore. The <a href="https://www.thehotline.org/resources/what-is-gaslighting/">Hotline</a> website defines and explains the origin of the term "gaslighting" by saying, <em>"This term comes from the 1938 stage play Gas Light, in which a husband attempts to drive his wife crazy by dimming the lights (which were powered by gas) in their home, and then he denies that the light changed when his wife points it out. It is an extremely effective form of emotional abuse that causes a victim to question their own feelings, instincts, and sanity, which gives the abusive partner a lot of power (and we know that abuse is about power and control). Once an abusive partner has broken down the victim's ability to trust their own perceptions, the victim is more likely to stay in the abusive relationship." </em>Gaslighting is a common tactic among emotional manipulators or people who manipulate others, and it is a form of manipulation that essentially makes you question your own knowledge of reality. You are not to blame, and in any case, you didn't sign up to receive this treatment and emotional abuse. When it comes to manipulation is the fault of the person who engages in mental and emotional manipulation or abuse alone. If you've survived emotional abuse, have left a relationship with a manipulative person, or want to talk about signs of manipulation with a professional, don't be afraid to reach out for the support of a therapist or counselor.</p>
<h3><span data-sheets-value="{" data-sheets-userformat="{" is="">What is the impact of emotional manipulation on your mental health?</span></h3>
<h3><span data-sheets-value="{" data-sheets-userformat="{" is="">How would you know that you are with someone who is emotionally manipulative?</span></h3>
<h3><span data-sheets-value="{" data-sheets-userformat="{" is="">What are the four phases of manipulation?</span></h3>
<h3><span data-sheets-value="{" data-sheets-userformat="{" is="">What are manipulators scared of?</span></h3>
<h3><span data-sheets-value="{" data-sheets-userformat="{" is="">Can you possibly outwit a manipulator? How?</span></h3>
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